Cold
by TilenaForever
Summary: Bellatrix realises that people start to miss things when they aren't there...
1. Cold

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, Bellatrix or Rodolphus Lestrange.  
AN: Came up with this when I couldn't sleep.  
This is probably going to be a short story.  
It's not really a Harry Potter story full of magic, broomsticks and wands, it's more just a story about their relationship.  
I'm not English or American, I could have made some mistakes.  
I couldn't really figure out which tense to use either, it's kind of messy.**

_Italic – Thoughts  
__**... Italic&Bold ... – Dreams**_

Cold… Cold… Cold…

For the past half hour she had been staring at the ceiling and all that she could think of was 'cold'.

Bellatrix had woken up a half hour ago and realised she was cold without the heat of her 'annoying' husband beside her.

_Bastard -_ she thought.

It was now almost 3 weeks ago that Bellatrix had kicked Rodolphus out of their bedroom.  
She thought he was being annoying and had decided that she didn't want him to be in the same bed as her.  
He was now probably sleeping in one of the many guest bedrooms of the Lestrange manor.

_Annoying little bastard -  
I don't need him -  
I can handle a bit of cold – _she was trying to reassure herself.

The first week she had been fine with it, but now everything seemed to be wrong without him beside her.  
She couldn't sleep, it was cold and she even had dreams about him.

It was rather stupid. She was obsessed with The Dark Lord... Their Dark Lord... Her Dark Lord...  
Not with her annoying husband...

No, after the first few years of marriage she had lost that feeling of love for Rodolphus and she couldn't care less about him. All her love was for her Dark Lord.  
But why if she only love the Dark Lord, why could she only think of her husband right now?  
Now, all she could think of was how wonderful their relationship had been.

She had dreams about the start of their relationship at Hogwarts, she could see herself falling in love with Rodolphus every night and then she would always wake up... Wide awake... Feeling the cold... Feeling alone...

She couldn't sleep after those dreams... The dreams only made her think more of Rodolphus.  
She hadn't slept properly in days.

It frustrated her.

_I love the Dark Lord and only him –_ she had been telling herself this for the last two weeks after Rodolphus had started to show up in her dreams , but that little sentence wasn't enough anymore...  
Rodolphus was everywhere...

So their Bellatrix Lestrange lay, thinking about her husband while staring at the ceiling and feeling the cold once again of a big bed only filled with one person.

_He deserves better... -  
I'm a horrible wife...-  
He deserves love... My love...-  
Why is he even still with me?-  
Ugh... Pureblood marriages..._ _-_ she thought.

They had a Pureblood marriage and their marriage had been arranged, but they had been very happy about that.  
They had fallen in love with each other at Hogwarts and were both whishing that their parents would arrange the marriage between them.  
Because of course as a Pureblood child, you weren't allowed to decide who you were going to marry.  
Everything had worked out fine and they had been the best young Pureblood couple in society.  
Until she ruined it all with her obsession for the Dark Lord...

Bellatrix let out a deep sigh and closed her eyes.  
Another attempt at some sleep...

**...**

''_**Bella, wait!'' Rodolphus was trying to catch up with the beautiful girl who was running before him.  
''Come and get me!'' Her loud cackle filled the halls of Hogwarts, it made him smile.  
He ran towards her and caught her by her wrist.  
''Would you just stop for a minute, please?'' He asked.  
She turned around. ''And why should I stop, huh?''  
''For this'' He leaned in and gave her a soft kiss.  
''Why did you do that?'' She asked.  
''Because a beautiful girl deserve a kiss'' He said.  
Bellatrix started to blush.  
''Are you blushing?'' He thought it was the most adorable thing he'd ever seen.  
'NO!'' she had already started running again.  
''Bellatrix! Wait!'' He screamed after her.  
Her cackle filled the air once again.**_

**...**

Her eyes snapped open, at once Bellatrix was sitting straight up in the bed.

_Not again - _She was trying to catch her breath.

And then she felt it again... The cold...

Cold... Cold... Cold...

This had to stop, those dreams were messing with her head...

_This has to stop -_  
_There has to be a solution... -_  
_Never sleep again?_  
_Or..._  
_I couldn't... I shouldn't... -_ Bellatrix had decided what to do

She slowly got out of the bed, the cold surrounding her.  
It was dark.  
She couldn't see anything.

After a couple of minutes of searching, she had found her wand.

''Lumos'' she whispered.

She slowly started to walk to the door, her eyes needed to adapt to the light.

It was even colder in the halls of the Lestrange manor.  
She looked around, trying to figure out behind which of the many doors her husband would be.

_Where is he? –_ then her eyes caught sight of a little bit of light coming out from under one of the doors...

_Is he awake too? -_ maybe he couldn't sleep either.

She walked towards the door.

She stood before it.  
Taking a deep breath, she slowly opened the door.

''Rodolphus?'' ''Rod?'' she whispered.

~~~~~~  
**I hope you liked it!**


	2. Here We Go Again

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, Bellatrix or Rodolphus Lestrange.  
AN: I'm not English or American, I could have made some mistakes.  
I couldn't really figure out which tense to use either, it's kind of messy.**

**I don't know if anyone reads this but I've decided to give it another go.**

**Let's bring in some Rodolphus, shall we?**

_Italic – Thoughts_

''Rodolphus?'' ''Rod?'' she whispered.

''Rod?'' she whispered.

She slowly pushed the door open and walked inside.

She was welcomed by the nice warm glow of the fireplace, she felt the heat of the fire warm up her body.

Rodolphus had been sitting on the edge of the bed and staring at the fire when he heard something.

At first he thought he had heard something that wasn't even there but when he looked up and saw his wife standing there, he knew it was for real.

''Bella?'' he was quite surprised that she was there.

She quickly turned around and saw Rodolphus sitting on the edge of the bed.

''Is everything alright?'' he walked over to her with a worried look on his face.

''You're still awake'' she stated.  
''Why?'' she was actually hoping he had the same problems as her.

''What are you doing here?'' ''Are you alright?'' he took her face in his hands and looked at her.

''Yes, I'm fine'' she pulled back.  
''Why are you still awake?'' she asked again.

''I couldn't sleep'' he shrugged.  
''Why are you?'' he asked.

''Cold'' ''I was cold'' Bellatrix looked at the ground.

''Cold?'' ''You never feel cold at night...''

''And how do you know that, huh?!'' she was already getting annoyed by him again.

Rodolphus sighed.

He really thought something had changed when his wife showed up in the middle of the night to see him.  
_Nothing ever changes – _he looked sad and disappointed.

Bellatrix saw his expression change and she even felt a little bit guilty.  
_Guilty? -  
No, you shouldn't feel guilty -  
He just shouldn't say stupid things- _  
_How does he know when I'm cold – _her annoyances clearly boiling up again.

''So, how do you know then?'' ''I really like to know'' she was raising her voice now.

''Bella, please'' ''It was stupid to say that'' ''Just leave it'' he sighed.  
''Don't get angry about things again'' now it was his turn to look at the ground.

''Again?'' ''Again?!'' ''I get angry whenever the hell I want!'' she shrieked.

''Obviously'' he whispered.

''What was that?!'' ''What did you say?!'' now she was yelling at him.

Then something snapped inside of Rodolphus.

''I said... Obviously!'' he yelled back.

''How dare you?!'' ''I'm your wife!'' she was shocked by his outburst.

''Oh really?!'' ''You are my wife?!'' ''You are not really good at being one then!'' ''You never show it and still... I still love you!'' he yelled.  
''I love you!'' ''Yes! I'm the stupid fool who still loves his wife, while his wife lost her love for him!'' he couldn't stop now, all his frustration was getting out.

''Poor little Rodolphus!'' she couldn't believe this was happening.

''Yes!'' ''Yes! Poor little Rodolphus!'' ''You don't care for me, what are you even doing here?!'' he yelled.

''Like I said... I was cold!'' she yelled back.  
''But apparently I can't be, according to my husband, because he can sense whenever I'm cold or not even when he's not in the same room!'' she let out a sarcastic laugh.

''Who's fault is that?!'' '' You kicked me out of our bedroom!'' ''My bedroom!'' he never had been so angry with his wife.

''Then how can you say that I wasn't feeling cold?!'' her anger also clearly visible.

''Because you never touch me!'' he had said before he even though about it.

Bellatrix was looking at him with wide eyes.

''What?!'' ''How dare you?!'' ''I don't want to touch you!'' ''You can get your dirty needs elsewhere!'' she shrieked.

''That's not what I meant'' he sighed.

''Well, what did you mean then?!'' she screamed in his face.

He had enough of her screaming.

''You never need me for my warmth!'' ''We never cuddle!'' he roared.

''Cuddle?!'' Bellatrix looked disgusted.

''Yes Bella!'' ''People cuddle when they're cold'' ''They get close together, share their warmth!'' ''I don't need you for my 'dirty needs'!'' he yelled.

''What am I doing here then?!'' ''If you don't need me anyway?!'' Bellatrix was actually starting to feel sad.

_Don't let his words hurt you –  
He probable doesn't even mean it-  
He's just angry -  
He loves you – _she didn't even know why she wanted him to say that she should stay with him, but she did.

''Go back to your own bedroom then!'' he pointed at the door.

''Maybe I will!'' she hadn't expected that he really would want her to leave.

''Fine!'' he roared.

''Fine!'' she shrieked.

Bellatrix stormed out of the room and slammed the door shut.  
Then she just stopped.

_Why does this happen eveytime? -  
This wasn't supposed to happen – _she thought.

She actually had gone to him for... For?  
For what actually? Warmth? Company?  
Love?

The sad feeling took over Bellatrix.

For the first time in many years tears were forming in her eyes and slowly they began streaming down her face.

She leaned with her back against the door, silently crying.

On the other side of the door, stood Rodolphus.

He was thinking about what had just happened.

_Why does this happen everytime? -  
I shouldn't have screamed at her -  
Oh,why do I love you so much Bella? -  
Is she alright? – _he was worried.

He slowly started walking towards the door.

_No, stop!-  
Don't go after her again-  
It's always the same –_ he would always follow her after an argument to try to make to better.

He would follow her and would already start to apologize even is he wasn't in the same room as her couldn't help it.

He opened the door.

''Bella, I'm sor-'' he started.

Bellatrix lost balance, the door she was leaning against now opened.

She crashed into the arms of her husband.

As fast as she could, she stood up straight.

''Bella?'' Rodolphus was confused.

He saw the tears on her cheeks.

''Oh Bella, I'm so sorry'' he stepped closer and dried her tears.

They looked deep into each other's eyes.

He came even closer...

She took a step forward too...

They came close to each other...

Before they could process what was going on, their lips met.

They did something they hadn't done for years...

They kissed...

**Yay!**


	3. Love Is Strange

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, Bellatrix or Rodolphus Lestrange.  
AN: I'm not English or American, I could have made some mistakes.  
I couldn't really figure out which tense to use either, it's kind of messy.**

**Thank you for the reviews on the last chapter!**

**I really struggled with this chapter, I had no idea how to end it...  
I actually don't really like it, I really have a feeling that it's kind of OOC and all...**

**Oh well, I gave it a try!**

**Read it you want to and tell me what you think.**

_Italic – Thoughts  
__**...Italic&Bold... - Flashback**_

They kissed...

They had almost forgotten what it was like to kiss each other.

The soft touch of their lips... The love... The warmth...

Warmth...

Bellatrix sure wasn't feeling cold anymore.

She didn't know what she was feeling...  
She had never cared for stupid things such as kisses or her husband in years.  
She had only cared about The Dark Lord and The Cause, but kissing Rodolphus right now just felt right.

Bellatrix was confused.

_Does this make me a traitor -  
Rodolphus is my husband after all, but The Dark Lord is... -  
He's my Master! -  
The Dark Lord... –_ then panic hit her.

What was she doing?! What were they doing?! What was going on?!

She pulled back.

As soon as she had done that, she felt cold again.

Rodolphus looked at her.  
He saw the panic in her eyes.

_This is not good... -  
I shouldn't have done that... –_ he could see she was not feeling comfortable.

''I... I'm sorry...'' ''The fighting and the screaming...'' he stuttered.

''The kissing...'' he whispered.

And there it was again.  
The guilt.  
Bellatrix Lestrange was feeling guilty again!

''No...'' ''No...'' ''It's just... I...'' ''I don't know... I...'' now it was her turn to stutter.

An awkward silence followed.

This was even worse than the fighting and the screaming.

The awkward silence... The weird looks... The Cold...

Cold... Cold... Cold...

Bellatrix shivered.

Rodolphus noticed.

''Bella, you're cold'' he said.

He came closer again and wrapped his arms around her.

She couldn't even remember the last time Rodolphus had given her a hug.  
He had tried to hug her many times of course, but she had always pushed him away.  
She had been so stupid, because having his strong arms around her was an amazing feeling.

Memories drifted back into Bellatrix's mind again, she remembered the first time that Rodolphus had given her a hug.

**...**

**It was a typical winter night and the cold air was spreading through the halls and rooms of Hogwarts.  
Bellatrix stood in the front of the fire in the Slytherin common room.  
She was all alone, everybody else had already gone to their warm beds.  
Bellatrix couldn't sleep, she was feeling cold.  
''Glad to see I'm not the only one who's not able to sleep'' Rodolphus Lestrange said.  
Bellatrix spun around, eyes wide and her mouth open in shock.  
''I'm sorry... I didn't mean to scare you'' he smiled at her.  
''I thought I was alone'' she smiled back at him.  
Another wave of cold air spread through the room.  
Bellatrix shivered.  
''You're cold'' Rodolphus stated.  
Rodolphus slowly approached her.  
''What are you doing'' Bellatrix looked up at him.  
Rodolphus wrapped his arms around her.  
''It's a cold night, Bella'' he whispered.**

**...**

Bellatrix tensed up, realising she remembered another thing of the start of her relationship with Rodolphus.

_Why does this keep happening? -  
That was years ago... –_ she was still trying to understand why she was remembering all these things.

Rodolphus immediately let go as soon as he had felt Bellatrix tense up.

''I... I'm sorry...'' he thought she had tensed up because he was touching her.

Bellatrix's thoughts were disturbed by the movement of his arms.

She looked up, she looked into his eyes and saw his disappointment.

''Why did you stop?'' ''It's not your fault, Rod'' she whispered.

_Rod... -  
Rod? -  
She hasn't called me Rod in years -  
This is a weird night... –_ maybe his wife really had changed.

He looked at her with a confused looked on his face.

Before he could say anything, Bellatrix kissed him again.

Bellatrix knew she was confusing Rodolphus with her actions, she was even confusing herself.  
She just couldn't help it, she just wanted to kiss him again.

He was always so gentle with her, he really cared for her.  
He loved her...

_He loves me -  
He still loves me -  
Love... -  
Maybe... -  
Do I? -  
Do I still love him? -  
He deserves my love after all those years... –_ Bellatrix wasn't feeling like herself, she never cared for people their feelings.  
She barely had feelings at all, but right now she was feeling so many things...

Bellatrix tangled her hands in his hair.  
Rodolphus wrapped his arms around her once again.

They both felt comfortable and warm.

After a couple of minutes, Rodolphus pulled away.

''Bella, what does this mean?'' he asked.

''I... I don't know, Rodolphus'' ''You...'' ''The Dark Lord...'' ''I just don't know'' she looked at the ground.

''Bellatrix, please!'' ''We obey our Lord and we're loyal, but I'm your husband!'' ''I love you!'' he sounded desperate.

_I honestly don't know -  
Do I love my husband? -  
What about my Master? -  
Maybe I don't love The Dark Lord... -  
I'm loyal! -  
I can't think... -  
Can I be a good Pureblood wife and be a loyal servant too? -  
Rodolphus is good at being a loyal servant and a Pureblood husband... –_ she really did think Rodolphus was a good husband, although she never told him that.

''Maybe it's better if I leave now'' ''We both need time to think'' she turned around to leave.

He caught her wrist and held her hand.

''Stay here tonight'' he said.

Bellatrix turned around and looked at him.

''I don't want you to feel cold again'' ''I can keep you warm'' he whispered.

A small sad smile appeared on Bellatrix's face.

_Please, Bella -  
Please stay with me -  
Please... -  
Please let her stay! -  
Please... –_ Rodolphus was desperate, he really wanted to have his wife back by his side.

''Rod...'' she sighed and slowly pulled her hand away.

''Please?!'' he asked.

''You deserve a good Pureblood wife'' she sighed again.  
''I ignored you for years, because I was obsessed with our Lord!'' she finally admitted it.  
''You deserve better, Rodolphus!'' she looked deep into his eyes.

''I don't want better, I want you!'' ''I don't need any time to think about that!'' he pulled her close with a swift move and kissed her again.

Although Bellatrix had said they needed to think 2 minutes earlier, she didn't protest about this.  
She wasn't even able to think when he kissed her!  
Who cared?  
Her husband loved her and... And...  
Well, whatever it was she was feeling...  
It felt good, it felt right...

A couple of minutes went by before they broke the kiss.  
They just simple stood there, holding each other in a tight embrace.

''Okay... I'll stay'' she whispered.

They let go of each other and walked towards the bed.

There was a comfortable silence this time as they got into the bed.

The big bed was nice and warm, after all it was filled with two people now.

''Good night, Rodolphus'' Bellatrix turned on her side, her back towards Rodolphus.

''Good night'' Rodolphus looked at his wife's back and sighed.

_At least she's here with me –_Rodolphus was kind of disappointed that she had turned her back on him.

''I love you'' he whispered.

Bellatrix heard him.  
She looked back over her shoulder at him.

Rodolphus just simple stared back at her.

She turned around and moved closer to him.

She laid her head on his chest.

He put his arms around her waist .

_I thought she didn't like to cuddle -  
Maybe... -  
There is a time for change... -_ he smirked.

They laid there in each other's arm, feeling comfortable and loved.

''I... I love you too'' she whispered.

Finally Bellatrix Lestrange wasn't feeling cold anymore...

**The End I Suppose...**


End file.
